Twittering Tales #122 – 5 February 2019 – It starts with one word…

It’s time again, for Kat Myrman’s wonderful challenge, to write a story, inspired by her picture prompt, in 280 characters or fewer.

Here is this week’s prompt and my contribution.

Check out all the fabulously creative entries here and, if you’ve never had a go, why not try a story of your own? You may surprise yourself!

classic-1834499_1280-1It starts with one word bt can’t contine mch frther becase this keyboard is tterly seless.
Jst how can I seflly se it?
Have yo not heard? Some stpid person called Trmp has decided to ban one of the letters!
He says it is nconstittional, and shold not be sed.
It’s jst pre rbbish.

Fck!

(279 characters)

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A quiet night?

No-one is writing,
nothing’s exciting,
has everyone gone to the pub?
No-one is sending.
Is the world ending?
As Hamlet said “Ay, there’s the rub.”
Did Trump press the button,
and now we’re all mutton,
dressed up like lambs to the slaughter?
If that is the case,
then I know my place,
it’s at home with my wife and my daughter!

The fly.

A fly came in and flew around, he buzzed this way and that.

It caused near apoplexy for my parrot and my cat.

My parrot said, “now bugger off”, my cat spoke not at all,

She was too busy flying round and bouncing off the wall.

 

My parrot said “I did not know that you could really fly.”

The fly, misunderstanding, said, “it’s just how I get by!”

The cat, meanwhile, was leaping up and down across the room.

The fly was sure to get caught soon and then would meet its doom.

 

I thought that I could help things out, and maybe swat the fly.

The parrot squawked, and grabbed the cat, and said “here let me try.”

The fur was flying all around, the cushions were all scattered;

The dogs walked in and chased  the bird, and fly, and cat, all tattered.

 

Now, dogs, and cat, and bird, and fly, were chasing round and round.

It made me oh so giddy that I fell down to the ground.

I tumbled round and round and round, and slowly I arose,

when very much, to my surprise, the fly flew up my nose!

 

Very soon the cat arrived, determined to give chase.

She tried her best to catch the fly but merely scratched my face.

The cat was closely followed by the dogs, and then the bird;

The situation really was becoming most absurd!

 

The outcome of this saga was determined by my wife.

She smacked me on the nose, and thus she ended all the strife.

The fly was done, it was no more, all thanks to our dear mummy;

I sniffed, and swallowed; down it went, it ended in my tummy!

Quid Pro Quo

images-18
I gave her quid
she gave pro quo
my new pet squid
she loves me so
she gives me hugs
with all her arms
with gentle tugs
she shows her charms
she loves me so
I’ve said before
she lets me know
she loves me more
she sucks my neck
she sucks my sides
but what the heck
she goes and hides
behind the chair
behind the shed
but she’s still there
I see her head
she likes to think
she’s one of us
she writes with ink
and takes the bus
there’s jealousy
from my dear wife
she fails to see
and gives me strife
she thinks I pay
too much attention
she doesn’t say
she fails to mention
she thinks I’ve gone
right off the grid
suggests a swan
instead of squid
but that would hurt
she’d get upset
if I did flirt
with another pet
I have to go
my squid awaits
she lets me know
that we’re just mates
but I know truth
I really know
my squid called Ruth
she loves me so!