Wednesday 10 September 2014
I didn’t want to wake up yesterday and, when I did, I didn’t want to get out of bed. I desperately did not want to start my first day without my Big Sister!
You see, she died on Monday evening after a battle with a terrible all encroaching cancer.
Not just down the road, or in another county, but thousands of miles away in South Africa.
My Little Sister let us know, and she was right, it isn’t fair! It’s not fair that we no longer have our Big Sister. It’s not fair that we cannot see her again. It’s not fair that we could not say our final goodbye. It’s not fair that she was younger, when she died, than her Mother and Father were when they died. It’s not fair that she had to leave her much loved husband, children, and grandchildren. It’s just NOT FAIR.
Today, it was a little easier to wake up and get out of bed; not a lot, but just a little. Tomorrow will be a little easier still, and so on, until a time when Big Sister will not be the first thought on my mind. She will always be looking over my shoulder though, keeping me on my toes as Big Sisters do.
Big Sister and I shared a birthday, 12 years apart. She was born on a Sunday, so was “bonny and blithe, and good and gay”. Actually, she was a whole lot more than that, but that will do for a start!
Older siblings often taunt younger ones that they can’t ever catch up, they will always be younger. It struck me, today, that this no longer applies. Little Sister and I have now started to catch up. We never wanted to do that!
Even though we saw each other rarely after Big Sister and family emigrated to South Africa, whenever we did meet up it was as if we’d only parted yesterday. Let’s hope it will always seem so!
Thank you for being my Big Sister.